Monday, February 1, 2010

Naked People Playing Statue

Something is up today. Auntie Cynthia came to visit again last night and she’s still here. The Lady spent extra time dusting the furniture and there seems to be more activity in the Dining Room involving the good silver, the collection of mismatched monogrammed napkin rings, and some antique hemstitched linen napkins. Is it Christmas again? Auntie Cynthia has been receiving a lot of instructions about being less exciting so I don’t pee my pants in her presence. She so much fun I just can’t help it! She get me so wound up and crazy that my eyes swirl independently in their sockets and I just lose all control of everything, my mind, my sense, my arms and legs, and the on/off switch in bladder. When I heard that bell ring in the house, this time I knew what it meant… visitors! The Lady went to the front door first and was talking to the visitor, explaining something about my special way of greeting everyone and pointing to his lovely Prada shoes. He was nodding and telling her he understood. Just as they were about to enter the linoleum protected kitchen to meet me, Auntie Cynthia opened the kitchen door that I was hiding behind, holding my breath. Of course I ran out into the living room and of course I peed when I met the tall man named Brett. I missed his shoes but I managed to get the parquet floor and a couple of the fancy little rugs. Auntie Cynthia got in Big Trouble for letting me out because she was supposed to do this one little thing to help train me so I could go visit her someday and not sprinkle anything on the VERY VERY VERY VERY fancy new floors in her house. She explained to The Lady she thought I was asleep and The Lady rolled her eyes and called her a disobedient big sister. Well, I WAS napping before the Visitor Bell rang, but did anyone really think I was going to sleep through the opportunity to meet new people? Seriously. After I met Brett, all four of them had a lovely lunch of homemade butternut squash soup topped with walnuts, parsley and dried cranberries, a salad with chicken and raspberry dressing, and some crème brulee for desert. (The Lady was delighted that her attempt at the desert of creamy goodness turned out so well.) I got plain dogfood and napped in my playpen in the kitchen. After lunch we all went out to the backyard to watch me run around. I must have done a good job since Brett wants to come back and bring Rex. Rex is his wire-hair terrier who looks like Asta from The Thin Man movies, and I can’t wait to meet him. Rex is very worldly and has taken airplane rides to visit his 1834 country mansion on the Ohio River in West Virginia. When he is here in LA, he lives in a loft in downtown LA with a view of the city and a hot tub on the roof, but in West Virginia he has a big yard of 14 acres with horses and snow and everything. I bet he’ll run around the yard with me. Yay! He might even do some digging. I’ll have to show him how easy it is to rip up the agapanthus. Auntie Cynthia, Brett, The Man and The Lady were having a nice chat when suddenly The Lady bolted out the door saying she didn’t realize it was this late and that she had to get to her class where she sits for three hours and draws naked people playing statue in uncomfortable poses.

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